I Have Seen The Lord

Oh how I love today’s gospel. Mary Magdalene was simply wrecked at the death and loss of her beloved Jesus. I can place myself into this scene easily as she wept outside the tomb. When I visit my dad’s grave at the cemetery, there is something so extra final about it. The being covered over by grass and a headstone gives it permanence and seals in the excruciating ache of never seeing him again. And yet, I go there because I find some sort of comfort in just being near him. Mary Magdalene had a very special relationship with Jesus. He delivered her from the insurmountable bondage of being a slave to seven demons and when that kind of freedom happens one is compelled to go “all in” for the one that freed you. Mary was all in for Jesus from the moment of her deliverance. She was there on the sidelines as he was scourged, beaten, and humiliated. She walked along with Jesus’ mom and the beloved apostle as her savior carried the sins of the world on his back. She stood and watched as nails were driven into her beloved’s body. She was there when he breathed his last breath. The agony of watching your loved one labor toward death is traumatic and only amplifies the grief when they are gone. Mary’s grief was all consuming and deafening. I understand this kind of grief. Can you feel her ache? Can you imagine the devastation? Can you enter into the mourning? Can you understand her confusion?

In her grief-stricken state, she hunkers down into the burial place of her beloved and finds two shiny guys hanging out. Let’s just add to Mary’s already conflicted mind! “Woman, why are you weeping?” Mary must have felt like she was taking crazy pills. I’m sorry, I was just looking for the dead guy that I left here two days ago, that’s all. Then she turned around and Jesus was there, but she didn’t recognize him. How many times have I been in such a confused state and all I needed to do was turn around to find Jesus? How many times have I not seen him standing right there because I was too caught up in my own stuff? He even spoke to her, “Woman, why are you weeping? (She must have been over all these men asking why she was crying. I mean come on, she was crying because her beloved was gone!!) Whom are you looking for?” Why was everyone messing with poor Mary that morning? Still unable to see who he was, she kind of blew off his question. How many times have I blown off a conversation with Jesus because I was unable to see or hear properly? This whole encounter reminds me of times in my life when I have let fear, trauma, and grief steal my ability to recognize Christ standing right in front of me. Then Jesus simply says her name, “Mary!” And in the hearing of her name, she finally recognized him. There was something in the way he said her name that would have revealed his identity. I’ve tried to imagine what it sounded like. I’ve tried to hear it the way Mary heard it that day. I’ve tried to insert my own name into the scene. Our names are more powerful than we can know. I know for me there have been a few close people in my life that when they say my name in a certain way, I feel found, I feel known, I feel safe, and I feel seen. This is what happened to Mary when her beloved said her name. The cloud of grief was lifted and she could see that which was always there: resurrection! I still find it beautiful and lovely and right that he chose Mary Magdalene to be the first one to see him come back to life. She must have had a very special place in his heart, and like Mary of Bethany, and John, the beloved apostle, their belovedness allowed them to be there even when things were scary or ugly or difficult. Knowledge of our belovedness gives us courage, confidence, grace, and the presence to do hard things. It gives us a special something that helps us show up for the one that loves us. 

Jesus tells Mary, “Stop holding on to me, for I have not yet ascended to the Father. But go to my brothers and tell them, ‘I am going to my Father and your Father, to my God and your God.’” This tells me that Mary must have wrapped her arms around him once she recognized him, which is a detail that I just love. What I wouldn’t give to hug my dad. Jesus calls her back into focus, saying we still have work to do. I’m only going to be here for a limited time and I need you to be the one to tell my freaked out friends that I’m alive. I need you to remind them that I am going to my Father, who is also your Father. There’s something about you Mary, in your bold faith, your loyal all in-ness, your tenacity, and your freedom that will get the message across to those stubborn and scared apostles of mine. Would Jesus be able to say the same thing to me? Would he trust me to take him to his beloveds? Is there something about me that Jesus can use to get his message across to the people he places in front of me? Am I willing to let go and announce, “I have seen the Lord”? 

My Memory Care sweethearts have no idea that there is a pandemic in the world and there is no way to explain what the heck social distancing is, so when I stepped off the elevator into their normal, they completely wrapped me up in hugs and kisses and more hugs and more kisses. At first I had twinges of guilt like I was breaking all the rules and that slowly faded into “They have seen the Lord!” and somehow they know that the vaccination is pure love. Please know that all the staff in memory care is being extra super cautious and diligent on our end with all the CDC guidelines of distancing, masks, gloves, and precautions, but the sweethearts just need their normal, and apparently that involves covering their beloveds with hugs and kisses upon their return from long journeys.  

Let this compelling scene between Mary and Jesus be a touchstone for us today. What is it about you that Jesus needs today? How does he say your name? Do you see him standing right in front of you? It is well with my soul.

Reading 1 ACTS 2:36-41

On the day of Pentecost, Peter said to the Jewish people,
“Let the whole house of Israel know for certain
that God has made him both Lord and Christ,
this Jesus whom you crucified.”

Now when they heard this, they were cut to the heart,
and they asked Peter and the other Apostles,
“What are we to do, my brothers?”
Peter said to them,
“Repent and be baptized, every one of you,
in the name of Jesus Christ, for the forgiveness of your sins;
and you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit.
For the promise is made to you and to your children
and to all those far off,
whomever the Lord our God will call.”
He testified with many other arguments, and was exhorting them,
“Save yourselves from this corrupt generation.”
Those who accepted his message were baptized,
and about three thousand persons were added that day.

Responsorial Psalm 33:4-5, 18-19, 20 AND 22

R.    (5b)  The earth is full of the goodness of the Lord.
or:
R.    Alleluia.
Upright is the word of the LORD,
and all his works are trustworthy.
He loves justice and right;
of the kindness of the LORD the earth is full.
R.    The earth is full of the goodness of the Lord.
or:
R.    Alleluia.
See, the eyes of the LORD are upon those who fear him,
upon those who hope for his kindness,
To deliver them from death
and preserve them in spite of famine.
R.    The earth is full of the goodness of the Lord.
or:
R.    Alleluia.
Our soul waits for the LORD,
who is our help and our shield.
May your kindness, O LORD, be upon us
who have put our hope in you.
R.    The earth is full of the goodness of the Lord.
or:
R.    Alleluia.

Alleluia PS 118:24

R. Alleluia, alleluia.
This is the day the LORD has made;
let us be glad and rejoice in it.
R. Alleluia, alleluia.

Gospel JN 20:11-18

Mary Magdalene stayed outside the tomb weeping.
And as she wept, she bent over into the tomb
and saw two angels in white sitting there,
one at the head and one at the feet
where the Body of Jesus had been.
And they said to her, “Woman, why are you weeping?”
She said to them, “They have taken my Lord,
and I don’t know where they laid him.”
When she had said this, she turned around and saw Jesus there,
but did not know it was Jesus.
Jesus said to her, “Woman, why are you weeping?
Whom are you looking for?”
She thought it was the gardener and said to him,
“Sir, if you carried him away,
tell me where you laid him,
and I will take him.”
Jesus said to her, “Mary!”
She turned and said to him in Hebrew, “Rabbouni,”
which means Teacher.
Jesus said to her, “Stop holding on to me,
for I have not yet ascended to the Father.
But go to my brothers and tell them,
‘I am going to my Father and your Father,
to my God and your God.’”
Mary went and announced to the disciples,
“I have seen the Lord,”

and then reported what he had told her.